After The Engagement: Getting Along With The In-Laws
Posted by Jessica Sharpe on Sat, Dec 17, 2011
When you marry someone, you get your partner’s family in the bargain. This means different things for different people, and your engagement may be a time where you and your future in-laws find ways to get along. Or perhaps you already know each other well, and consider each other friends. Your partner will also be building a relationship with your parents, which can be an unusual experience! There are three things to remember when you’re dealing with your in-laws during your engagement.
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They love your partner. Generally speaking, you can assume that your future in-laws love your partner very much. They want only the best for your partner, and it is human nature to be a little reserved before they get to know you. It’s important to remember, especially during your engagement, that anything they say or do stems from that love
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They want to like you. Even though they may be reserved at first, they probably want to like you very much. They will be reconciling their hopes and what they may have imagined with the reality of you, and despite knowing better, there may be some conflict with that. Be yourself, but be respectful as they get to know you.
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You are your own household. During your engagement, your roles as a couple will change. You will be considered -- and may even feel -- more like an adult, with the ability to say “no” to requests for drop-in visits and weekly lunches. Setting your boundaries now will serve you well during your marriage -- especially when there are grandchildren in the picture!
How do you get along with your in-laws?
